Jump Start # 3855
Proverbs 14:13 “Even in laughter the heart may be in pain, and the end of joy may be grief.”
So often as one reads the wisdom in Proverbs, life’s experiences remind him that these statements are true. There isn’t a lot of theological depth to our verse today. It is not wrapped around ancient prophecies or promises of God. It is a truism known to both believers and unbelievers. Even in laughter the heart may be in pain.
Here are some thoughts:
First, grief is a journey, not a moment. People travel that journey at different rates of speed. Some seem to do well and others are nearly crippled. And, when one carries grief deep within their soul they may wonder if they will ever smile again or laugh. Some may even feel guilty for laughing. Long ago, many wore black clothes for long periods of time, to show others that they were grieving.
You and I pop into a funeral home to visit with a friend who had a loved one pass away. We say a few words, hug and go on our way. Back to work and back to the things that we do. But, for that grieving person, a chapter has ended for them. A seat is empty. It takes time to recover. Like a surgery, sorrow hurts at first. And, like a surgery, there is often a scar that reminds you of what you went through. But in time, things heal. You can talk about it. You can laugh once again.
Second, laughter is temporary and superficial. It doesn’t solve the pain deep inside someone. Not all grief is from a death. Some grief is not known to others. No funeral is planned. No food is taken. But for righteous parents of a prodigal, there is a sorrow that few notice or understand. For others, it’s the deep wounds of bitterness that was said to them, sometimes by brethren. It’s hard to walk back into the church building after someone has been unkind and mean to you.
Laughter is for a moment. Laughter is a band-aid to cancer. Getting sad people to laugh may make us feel good and feel that we have taken their minds off of things and even convinced us that we did them a lot of good, but the pain of the wound remains. Sometimes it’s better to talk about the difficult rather than hide behind the laughter. Laughter ends, but the grief remains. Helping with the grief has longer impact, even though the tears and sorrow is something that most do not want to see.
Third, one thing that helps is realizing that God understands. God had prodigals. He had a bunch. Israel would be first and foremost. God has no joy in the death of the wicked, Ezekiel reminds us. Yet, God sees the wicked going to war with each other. God sees the violence of crimes. And, God saw His own Son die upon the cross. It is easy for us to think that we are alone with our sorrow and that no one else understands. God does.
Is our passage saying that laughter is wrong to a grieving heart? No. It’s wanting us to see that laughter doesn’t change things. The problems that caused the grief remains. This is one of the troubles with pills so many take because they are depressed. Sometimes it is necessary to get our mental balance. But, the pills do not solve what caused us to be depressed in the first place. The pills may put us to sleep. They may numb us. They may stabilize us, but the issues remain. The same is true with laughter. For the moment, it takes ones minds off of the problems. For the moment, joy returns. But, the laughter quickly ends, and back to the troubles that plagued that heart continues.
The real hope is found in the Lord. God often will not remove the troubles, but will journey with us through those dark and long valleys. The stronger the faith, the greater and better one handles troubles, sorrow and grief. Tears are a part of life. Tears come because we care and we love. But, tears must never take away our faith and trust in the Lord.
We are headed to a place where there are no tears, sorrow or death. Such is something that we have never known or experienced. There is always something wrong. People continue to disappoint and let others down. Troubles and fears fill the day, yet our hope is in the Lord who is greater than any trouble and any fear we may experience. God was greater than the mighty Egyptians. God was greater than the aggressive Assyrians. God was greater than the powerful Babylonians. He is greater than the Greeks and the Romans. He is greater than America, China, Russia and Iran.
Does Jesus care, we sing. The chorus confidently answers with, “Oh yes, He cares, I know He cares.”
Roger