Jump Start # 3928
2 Samuel 18:32 “Then the king said to the Cushite, ‘Is it well with the young man Absalom?’ And the Cushite answered, ‘Let the enemies of my lord the king, and all who rise up against you for evil, be as that young man!’”
Our verse today comes from a tragic chapter in David’s life. Twice he asks if his son Absalom was safe. Absalom had become the rebel prince. He tried to take over the throne and even planned to kill his father. David had to flee Jerusalem. David’s army engaged in battle with the forces aligned with Absalom. The battle favored David’s seasoned army. Absalom fled. He got tangled up in a tree and was left dangling there. David’s commander caught up with Absalom and thrust three spears into his heart.
As word is brought to David about the conflicts, he immediately asks about his son. Is the young man safe? What is tragic about this is that David asked this question decades too late. Long before this when his daughter Tamar was rapped by Amnon, and violent anger filled Absalom, that question should have been asked. When Absalom plotted and planned and killed Amnon in revenge, that question should have been asked. When years passed and David and Absalom, living in the same city, did not speak to each other, that question should have been asked. But, now he asks, as his son is trying to kill his father and take over the kingdom.
What a great question to ask: Is the young man safe? We need to be asking that question as well.
· We need to ask that because our world is not safe physically. The third leading cause of death among teens today is suicide. That follows homicide and unintentional injuries.
· We need to ask that because our world is not safe morally. Forty-three percent of teens, nearly half, have had sexual relations before the age 18. Explicit music, obscene movies and videos, foul language have become the norm. The pollution of the mind has ruined many souls.
· We need to ask that because our world is not safe spiritually. Churches are more interested in the flavor of coffee, the happiness of your heart than the salvation of your soul. Instead of preaching the Bible, churches put on comedy skits and show movies. Mega churches are filled with people who have no clue about the Bible, but are convinced that they are Heaven bound simply because they are good.
Parenting isn’t for cowards these days. Parents must stop trying to be your child’s best friend for life and buckle up and be the parents that God expects. This means turning off the electronics, including the parents phones and getting to know your child. It means taking walks with them. It means establishing boundaries, rules that are realistic and sticking to those.
Just because you bring your child to worship services does not mean that he is engaged or even believes. Conversations. Questions. Being an example. Those are the beginning points. Pray and pray daily for your children. The world is not safe and they need you and the Lord.
Here are some thoughts:
First, parenting is personal. There is no other way around that. It’s not the grandparents role. Don’t search for a video on your phone that you can get them to watch. This is what you are to do. This is more important than your job. This is more important than the house. The greatest king of Israel could bring peace to the nation, but he couldn’t bring peace to his home. Don’t let that be your story.
You must have a barrel of patience. You’ll need that. You must control your emotions. Shouting in anger is not good parenting skills. You need to present an atmosphere where your child does not fear talking to you, coming to you with problems, or being transparent and honest with you. Taking to dad should not be viewed as going to the principal’s office.
Second, your role model is God. You’ll never be completely like Him, but you are looking to the Lord for lessons. The patience of God while Israel, His child, was off dancing with idolatry. The forgiveness of God when the prodigal came home. The firmness of God when His people were rebellious and no longer listening to Him.
God never punished the people for something they did not know was wrong. God gave the law first. God expected His people to keep the law. The disobedience came when they rejected the law.
Third, remember yourself as a young person. Most of us did some really dumb stuff. It took us a while to get our act together and to become decent disciples of Jesus. Remember that. Don’t expect your child to be perfect. There is a difference between a mistake and rebellion. Spilling a glass of juice happens. I still do that. Looking at you, with an evil smile on their face, while they purposely pour a glass of juice on the floor is rebellion. You respond differently to an accident and rebellion. Kids learn quickly if you are all talk and don’t back up your words.
Your life changed for the better when you got Christ in your heart. The same will work for your child. Show them how to serve others by including them as you help others.
Is the young man safe? For David, Absalom had not been safe for a long, long time. Let’s not ask this question when it is too late.
Roger